Satire: this article is a work of parody and humor. The events described did not happen. NEW YORK — A single sermon clip has completed the full lifecycle of modern internet discourse in record time, going from "obscure church video" to "national emergency" to "forgotten by Thursday" in under 72 hours, sources confirm. The clip,…
Satire: this article is a work of parody and humor. The events described did not happen. In a stunning act of journalistic protest, the major television networks have suspended their pooled coverage of the president, a decision insiders say was "about principle" and also "about how nice it is to not work Mondays." Networks Discover…
Satire: this article is a work of parody and humor. The events described did not happen. The Outrage Machine Hums Along In a development that has shocked absolutely no one who has ever watched cable news, viewers are once again demanding that a network fire a commentator — the same commentator they tune in to…
Satire: this article is a work of parody and humor. The events described did not happen. In a landmark ruling for the future of televised discourse, a popular cable news panel show has been officially reclassified as a full-contact sport. The decision came after the latest episode featured commentators trading verbal blows with such intensity…
Satire: this article is a work of parody and humor. The events described did not happen. In a move that surprised absolutely no one who has ever observed Washington, a cable news host has publicly suggested that a former White House press secretary should get her own television show — officially activating the city's most…
Satire: this article is a work of parody and humor. The events described did not happen. In a blockbuster move that has sent shockwaves through the world of daytime television, a cable news network has traded one of its star panelists from the noon show to the 5 p.m. show — a deal analysts are…
Satire: this article is a work of parody and humor. The events described did not happen. BOSTON — Following the mistrial in one of the most heartbreaking criminal cases in recent memory, the nation's true-crime media complex sprang into action with the solemnity of a marching band, unveiling fresh graphics, a new theme song, and…
Satire: this article is a work of parody and humor. The events described did not happen. America's cable news networks have done it again: transforming a solemn courtroom proceeding into must-see television, complete with theme music, a countdown clock, and a panel of shouting experts who have collectively passed the bar exam zero times. Trial…
Satire: this article is a work of parody and humor. The events described did not happen. The entertainment world is reeling from the latest escalation in the feud between a comedian and a cable news host, a conflict that has now entered its third decade and shows no signs of stopping, much like the cable…
Satire: this article is a work of parody and humor. The events described did not happen. Cable News Activates Emergency Graphics Package; Retired Generals Report for Duty Within minutes of reports of an incident in the Persian Gulf, the nation's cable news networks executed their most sacred ritual: the dramatic lowering of the studio lights,…
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